In 1952, eight-year-old Elaine Toma placed a post on the “Pen-pals Wanted” page in the Family Herald. Halfway across the country, Alice Wessenger in Burlington, Ontario was one of the first to answer.
The two had a lot in common; they were both eight years old, from a rural background, and each came from a family with limited income.
This initial exchange of letters sparked a long-term friendship between the two. Though they lived hundreds of miles apart, the girls shared in laughter, shed tears together, exchanged girl-talk, and confided their secrets to one another.
Alice recalls the encouragement she received from her mother when she began sending the letters.
Because travel was out of their budget, the letters were a special way for the world to be opened up to Alice. It was also a practical way of developing good creative writing, spelling and communication skills.
At the time postage stamps were only five cents each, so the letters were no real burden on the pocketbook. Elaine said they also always managed to exchange some small souvenir at Christmastime.
“I was always eager Christmas morning to see what arrived from Eastern Canada. Alice said they always opened their Western Canada gifts on Christmas Eve,” said Toma. “We were always very excited with and prized whatever choices were made.”
In those early days of communicating, the girls responded almost immediately. Alice would be so eager to read Elaine’s newest letter she would tear open the envelop as soon as she got home, even before she ate the dessert snack her mother had ready for her after school.
Alice had a long walk to and from school each day: two and one half miles, which was made in any weather. Elaine had a much shorter walk, at one and one half mile to walk to the school bus.
Eventually Wessenger graduated, became a school teacher, got married and made her home in Guelph, Ontario where she had two children.
Elaine graduated from Lorne Jenken High School and took a job as an office worker. She was married and had four children, moving from Edmonton to an acreage in the Lunnford area to raise a family.
Life went on, but the two ladies kept in touch.
“We continued to correspond by mail and shared our life stories and adventures, our ups and downs,” said Elaine. “Although the letters were a little less frequent with our busy schedules, we still shared our feelings and were delighted to hear from each other.”
Alice added even in these days of email, receiving handwritten mail from Elaine still very much excites her.
“Letters are tangible, real. They can be held, touched and saved,” said Alice. “Emails are read and then fly off into cyberspace somewhere. Oh yes, they can be printed off, but physically they are not something both her and I have touched.”
Finally, in 1978, the two had the privilege of meeting in face to face. Alice, her husband, and her two children drove from Ontario to see the western provinces.
Elaine invited her parents, siblings and their children, and special neighbours to meet the family from Ontario. She even decorated a cake, which read “Welcome to the West.”
When Alice and her family drove onto the acreage, it was a moment of happiness Toma can still easily recall.
The next day, the two families piled into Elaine’s station wagon and headed out for a picnic lunch. The group also stopped in at Toma’s parents to see the calves and ponies, and Thunder Lake where the children had a grand time on the merry-go-round and log horse.
This was not the only opportunity Elaine and Alice had the opportunity to spend time together off the pages of their letters.
In 1985 Elaine and her husband traveled to Fort Erie, Ontario with the Barrhead Concert Band as chaperones, as their daughter was in the band. On a free afternoon, Alice and her husband drove to Fort Erie and gave the Albertans a tour of the area.
“We visited Marineland then went out for a delicious supper, and they took us to one of their big malls,” said Elaine. “It was great to meet up with them again and spend a few hours.”
It would be another 18 years before Elaine and Alice were reunited.
In the middle of Sept. 2013, Elaine’s daughters began planning a surprise open house for the Toma’s 50th wedding anniversary. Invites went out through phone calls, Facebook, and emails, one of which made its way to Alice.
Although Alice initially replied she would be unable to make the trip, she went to bed thinking how much she really wanted to celebrate this milestone with Elaine and her husband.
After Alice’s son agreed to make the trip with her, it was decided: Alice and Elaine would be together once again.
On Friday, Oct. 11, the weekend of the anniversary celebration, Elaine’s family presented her with a box. Inside the box was a note that read “Guess who came all the way from Ontario to celebrate your special day?”
Heart skipping a beat, Elaine knew this could only mean one thing.
“The word Ontario gave it away as Alice is the only person I know from Ontario. I guessed this and in walked Alice,” smiled Elaine. “I was on top of the world and tears of joy poured out as we hugged each other and became reunited. This was the best gift I could have received.”
Unfortunately the visit came to an end much too soon for the lifetime friends. Though the women made their farewells last as long as they could, Alice and her son had to leave to the airport 9 a.m. Sunday morning.
The two may be parted, but Elaine hopes she and her far-away friend from the east will be able to meet again. In the meantime, she can look back over her anniversary celebration weekend with great fondness.
“Hopefully we will have an opportunity to get together again real soon,” said Elaine. “With all the pictures and memories, I will relive this visit over and over.”
