One of the greatest mysteries known to either half of the human race is what the heck the other half is thinking.
The one thing both sides tend to agree on is it’s not easy to stay with the same person for any extended period of time.
And of course, opinions on how to make love last in a successful relationship are a dime a dozen.
Last Saturday evening at the Westlock Legion’s Valentine’s Day dance, there were many happy couples that readily shared their advice.
Keith and Gail Sterling have been married for more than half a century, and although neither came out and explicitly said it, it was clear that a good sense of humour has a lot to do with their success.
“We’ve been married 51 and a half years,” Keith said with a grin. “If I’d been serving two life sentences, I’d be a free man now.”
Some women might have taken offence to that statement, but Gail just took it in stride.
“You have your ups and downs, but you have to work at it no matter what,” she said. “I think that’s why so many marriages fail now; it’s too easy to split up.”
With the joking out of his system — for the time being, anyway — Keith agreed the secret is hard work. “Each person has to put in 60 per cent, not just 50/50,” he said.
Not only are couples not staying together as long as they used to, he added, that relative lack of commitment translates to other aspects of our lives as well.
For example, it used to be that employees made much longer commitments to their jobs, but that is no longer that case either.
Ultimately, Keith said, it comes down to your expectations. If you want perfection, you’re likely to be disappointed.
“I would suggest people shouldn’t set their expectations too high,” he said. “That’s a recipe for disaster.”
Whatever they did worked, however, as 51 years, two kids, four grandkids and smiles on their faces can attest to.
“It helps to have had Alzheimer’s for the last 40 years,” Keith added.
At the other end of the spectrum, Joshua Collins and Cosette Dubrule are two high-school students who have been dating for just one month.
Although they’ve only been together for a short period of time, both said they think the key to making their relationship last will be some hard work and perseverance, as well as having reasonable expectations.
“I think a big part would be acceptance,” Cosette said. “You have to be OK with who you’re with,” instead of trying to change them.
Joshua echoed that sentiment, adding that the key is perseverance.
He said he met Cosette two and a half years ago and knew the first time he saw her he was interested, but she had a boyfriend at the time so he had to be patient.
“It was definitely worth the wait,” he said.
“You’re just saying that because I’m sitting right here,” Cosette replied, proving that a sense of humour has as much of a place in the early stages of a relationship as in the later stages.
