Theirs is a story many couples will relate to.
It is a story without extravagant frills, without pretentiousness. Yet it is a story packed with the kind of drama that usually goes unrecorded beyond a family circle.
Jeff and Marjolaine Loitz come across as a regular couple. They met at a party in 1984, got engaged a year later and married on Valentine’s Day, 1987.
They worked hard, earning enough to progress from a mobile to a delightful two-storey house with a large yard ideal for their dog, Muffin. Their proudest achievement is raising three beautiful daughters.
Twenty-five years after exchanging vows, the couple’s love for each other has not dimmed. There have been challenges, of course, and arguments aplenty, but none so serious or strong to tear them apart.
“Leaving has never been an option for us,” says Marjolaine, who advises couples never to run from problems.
There may not be a template for a successful marriage, but Jeff and Marj are good examples of a healthy, evolving partnership that has stood the test of a quarter of a century. There is a sort of glory in what they have achieved, although I suspect neither will readily accept it couched in those terms.
The couple say they first bonded while listening to Simon and Garfunkel, the folk duo whose music in the 1960s became the soundtrack for so many young lives.
Here I pick out five Simon and Garfunkel songs that seem to capture a part of Jeff and Marj’s ongoing story, a story worth telling with Valentine’s Day only a week away.
The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin’ Groovy): How it all began as two teenagers hit it off during a party in 1984. They felt groovy that night, full of love for life … and each other. Jeff took Marj home and asked her out for a date.
Homeward Bound: The couple have spent married life in Barrhead, except for one difficult year in Whitecourt. Those 12 months convinced them Barrhead was home for their music, thoughts and love.
America: Already lovers who married their fortunes together, they developed a shared passion for travelling. Jeff credits Marjolaine for broadening his horizons beyond Barrhead and its environs. They have been on road trips, gone overseas and will be celebrating their anniversary in Mexico.
Bridge Over Troubled Water: When Marjolaine suffered health challenges, Jeff was her bridge to calmer water. He took her part when darkness came and pain was all around. He comforted her and laid himself down.
The Sound of Silence: With their children growing up and leaving home, the couple’s home is getting quieter. Once Mackenzie, the youngest, is gone, they will probably close off the upstairs part of the house. For Marjolaine, the promised period of peace will be a chance for them to devote more time to each other.
Well, that’s the song list. Now it’s our turn to take the microphone. So let’s clear our throats and sing as if our lives depended on it.
With Valentine’s Day approaching, we should sing a song of love for Jeff and Marj and sweethearts everywhere.
We should also sing for those yearning for love, and even for those who believe they are immune from such a perilous passion.
For what will survive all of us are not possessions, but love.
Love. And memories of love.
